


ritsu fucks up his blind date

by ritsuizu



Series: waiting for my valentines [1]
Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Implied Sexual Content, M/M, but who cares, mao being a mom, ritsu and izumi being total shits, this is horribly trashy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-01
Updated: 2016-02-01
Packaged: 2018-05-17 14:53:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5874979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ritsuizu/pseuds/ritsuizu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>literally.</p>
            </blockquote>





	ritsu fucks up his blind date

**Author's Note:**

> shout out to the entire ritsuizu chat for without them, this horrible thing wouldn't exist at all.  
> this is around a day late but yolo.

“Izuuuuuuuumiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

“No means no Yuu-kun. Even if you’re the one asking, I’m not going on a blind date. He could be a stalker for all I know.”

Makoto frowns at that. “Funny you should say that, Izumi-san…”

Izumi stares at him, both hands at his hips. “What was that just now?”

“Nothing! Nothing at all.” Makoto denies furiously until Izumi backs off. He sighs in relief and continues, “But really, it’s going to be fine! He’s Isara-kun’s childhood friend and I’ve met him a few times already, he’s very…” He trails off, unable to find the right words to say. How does one describe Sakuma Ritsu without making him sound,  _ eccentric _ ….

“See, you can’t even say anything nice about him!” Izumi says, pointing and staring at Makoto dramatically. He sighs and then turns away, “Isara is a nice kid, I have to admit that but I have nothing to say about someone I haven’t even seen yet.”

“I just don’t know how to describe him okay but he’s not suspicious, I swear. I think I have a picture of him somewhere on my phone…” Makoto digs out his phone and goes through his gallery. He finds a few pics of Ritsu smirking at the camera triumphantly after one of his usual pranks and he’s sure he’s not supposed to show those to Izumi if he wants to give him a good impression of Ritsu. He eventually finds one of Ritsu napping peacefully on the couch and he has to admit, it looks quite cute.

He enlarges the photo and shows it to Izumi. “Here’s how he looks like Izumi-san. Isn’t he cute? Not as cute as--”

Izumi flashes his hand out, looking grossed out. “Whoa, hold it. I may accept your relationship but I don’t think I’ll ever want to listen to you yap on like a lovesick fool.” He takes the phone away from Makoto’s hand and scrutinizes the photo. The person in the photo  _ did _ look cute all curled up on the couch like that but a picture of someone sleeping can be a bit misleading at times.

“Hey Yuu-kun, don’t you have any more pics of him? Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I like him, it’s just that you can’t really judge a person by how they look when they’re asleep.”

“You shouldn’t really judge a person by how they look, Izumi-san..”

Izumi looks up from the phone and smiles as sweetly as he can. Makoto silently mutters an ‘oh shit’ before the lecture starts.

 

“C’mon Ritsu, just this once? I’ve met him a few times already and well, he’s very… uh… he’s very pretty!? Cute too, I guess.”

“That doesn’t really sound convincing Maa-kun…” Ritsu stares as Mao scratches his cheek. He’s hiding something about this Sena Izumi person and while he is quite curious about the person Maa-kun is setting him up with, he’s not wasting his precious sunday on this dumb double date with his pushover of a boyfriend.

“Come on, you need to get a life, Ritsu. Live a little more. I’m just very concerned about your future, you know? I’m sure you won’t regret it if you come.”

Ritsu yawns then sits up, looking Mao in the eye, he says “I dunno Maa-kun~ I’m not feeling especially convinced.”

Mao sighs, “I’ll buy you snacks for the entire month.”

“Make it two.”

“One and a half.”

Ritsu smiles. “Deal.”

 

Ritsu barely manages to get dressed in time for Mao to pick him up for their double date with Mao’s boyfriend whose name he still could not remember and the boyfriend’s friend. He attempts to sleep on Mao’s shoulder on their walk to the restaurant but Mao swats him away each time, telling him to look alive. He’s starting to get cranky. It’s not late enough in the afternoon for him to even be awake and now Maa-kun won’t let him nap on him. This date had better be worth it.

They get to the restaurant before the other two so he could nap on the table for a while. Mao almost didn’t let him but the cute sleepy baby look almost never failed to win Mao over. A few moments later, Mao repeatedly taps on his arm and he vaguely hears the glasses boyfriend kid before Mao gives up on waking him normally and just pulls him upright. He blinks once, twice, and suddenly he’s staring at aquamarine eyes. He blinks again and, oh he  _ is _ pretty. Very much so. He smiles, sweet and easy and the pretty guy does the same. Mao turns to look at him, smiling from ear to ear.

Mao leans back to casually whisper to him, “What do you say, Ritsu? He’s pretty no? Do you like him already?”

He smiles the biggest and fakes smile he can muster at Mao, “You’re ruining it for me Maa-kun.”

“Haha, sorry sorry,” He scratches his cheek then holds his hand out for Ritsu to take it, “C’mon we have to go greet them.”

“You’re being a mom again Maa-kun, I can get up on my own.”

“Ritsu… You’re all grown up…” Mao wipes on a fake tear and Ritsu stares at him.

“Maa-kun, if you’re gonna be like this, I’m gonna leave.”

“Eh!? But what about your date?”

Ritsu smiles suggestively, “I’m taking him with me of course.”

Mao closes his eyes, “Ritsu… No… just, no.”

Hopefully Ritsu can act normal enough for something to develop between them. Then again they're both pretty odd people… Mao rubs at his chin. Maybe this can work...

 

“So, so? What do you think Izumi-san? Does he look your type?”

Izumi looks away with an exaggerated huff, “Weren’t you the one lecturing me on not judging someone based on their appearance?”

Makoto smirks,  _ he so likes him, at least aesthetically _ . He’s glad it’s turning out well so far. Hopefully things would turn out for the best but knowing the people he’s with, it seems like an impossibility. He watches as Ritsu and Mao make small talk then get up to approach them.

“Ah, here they come Izumi-san. Play nice.”

“You’re being annoying Yuu-kun. I’m always nice--and before you say anything,” Izumi smiles sweetly and Makoto grimaces and nods. “Good boy, Yuu-kun.”

“Good afternoon Isara-kun, Sakuma-san. Sorry we're late, we got caught up in  _ something _ …”

Suspicious… but whatever. Ritsu holds back a yawn as he steps forward. He notes that this Sena Izumi is a tiny bit taller than him and that he really is cuter up close. Maybe Mao knows his tastes better than he does.

“It’s fine, we didn't have to wait that long now did we, Maa-kun?” Mao nods, “See? Now where was I…”

He steps even closer until he’s standing face to face with Izumi. He smiles and extends his hand. “Sakuma Ritsu, pleased to meet you.”

Izumi gapes at him for a few seconds before hurriedly taking the raven head’s hand in his and with the most charming smile he can muster, “Izumi Sena, likewise.”

They both just stand there, still awkwardly shaking hands before Mao and Makoto cough and clear their throats. 

“Hate to interrupt your moment guys but we have a problem.” Mao says, stepping forward with Makoto trailing behind him.

“Yeah, big problem. Turns out we only booked a table for two so~~.” Makoto says, not even bothering to conceal his, probably their, plan.

“We’re gonna have to leave you two alone.” They say together and Ritsu feels the grip on his hand getting tighter. Ritsu totally understands. He wants to smack them both too. Before either of them could get a word in, the newly dubbed idiot duo just declared that they can have their date at home so that they can feel free to enjoy their own date. The two of them hurry to the exit but before they go out they say “Don’t do anything stupid.” and “Be nice.”

When they’re both finally alone and still awkwardly holding hands, Ritsu sighs before letting go and shoving his hands in his pockets. “They’re both idiots. It’s a match made in heaven.”

Izumi laughs. “The most annoying idiots, but I agree. They’re made for each other, clearly. I can’t even remember why I was so against them before. Whatever. Wanna eat?”

“Why I thought you’d never ask. After you, princess~.” Ritsu makes a mock bow and Izumi glares at him.

“Do you want me to smack you?”

Ritsu smirks, “Cute  _ and _ feisty. I’m liking you so~ much already.”

Izumi harrumphs and looks away, “Flattery won’t get you anywhere.”

He attempts to hide his blush by walking at least 5 steps ahead and Ritsu lets him have his moment of denial. He’ll play nice. For now.

 

The day after the blind date, Ritsu wakes up to Mao sitting on his bed and staring at him all gung-ho. “Soooooooooooo~ How did your date go?”

Ritsu chucks a pillow at him as he stretches. His limbs definitely felt sore. It’s been quite a while since he’s had some strenuous exercise. Maybe doing it at the alleyway was a bad idea, he’s not as young as he used to. Or maybe the few other rounds was overkill, but who cares. He’s found an extremely cute new toy and he’s making sure to savor him well.

“Well~ playing nice was boring so I went ahead and pissed him off.”

Mao face palms so hard at that. “But. Why.”

“I dunno, I thought he’d be cute pissed off. He totally was, by the way.” Mao looks at him oddly at that. “Looks like I enjoyed the date. As thanks for introducing me to Secchan, I’m gonna be nice and let shorten your snack duty period to one month.”

“Secchan,  _ who? _ ”

Ritsu rolls his eyes. “Secchan is Secchan, obviously.”

“Right… Anyways, what happened after?”

“I don’t really remember much other than how amusing it was to piss him off, and then one thing led to another and then…” Ritsu smiles suggestively.

Mao grimaces. “Don’t… don’t tell me you actually…?”

“I’m stopping by his place in a few to pick things up.” Ritsu smiles wider, “Want details on what happened? I’m very willing to share.”

“You’re gross.” Mao says as he throws the pillow back at him.

Ritsu crawls towards Mao and hugs him, nuzzling him all cutely, “I remember you saying that Secchan was cute. Let me tell you how cute he was, Maa-kun.”

“Ugh, you’re gross, stop acting cute while saying gross things, you’re tainting the word cute for me!” Mao all but shrieks as he tries to pull away from Ritsu’s grasp.

Ritsu pouts, “Fine, but you’re totally missing out.”

They both lie together in silence until Ritsu speaks up again.

“Hey Maa-kun, do you have any painkillers, I just remembered that I had to bring some later.”

Mao really just wants to die at that point. He silently prays for Izumi and hope that he regrets none of this.

 

“Izumi-saaaan~”

Izumi groans, “Go away Yuu-kun, I feel terrible.”

“Come ooon, open the door already! Was the date that bad?” Makoto whines as he pounds on the door. As far as he knew, the both of them hadn’t gone home until early morning and he just naturally assumed that it went well

“I dunno~ you tell me. A few minutes into the date he started harassing me.”

Makoto chuckles nervously. If the date went horribly Izumi would probably take it out on him and dear lord, no one deserved that kind of misery. “A-And what did you do afterwards…?”

“Obviously I fought back, and then after......”

Oh boy, he should have saw this coming. Ritsu liked bullying people. Izumi liked bullying people. They both liked to piss people off and they were both awfully competitive. They probably turned pissing each other off into a contest. If they do somehow end up hooking up, they’d be the power couple of shittiness. He can see it already. His life. A misery.

“Hey Yuu-kun, are you even listening to me?! Ugh, you’re sooo annoying. You come here and interrogate me and now you won’t even listen. I don't remember raising you to turn out like this.”

Makoto stares at Izumi’s non visible figure behind the door, stares at it as though it was him and that he’d turned into the literal trash that he was, “I don’t remember you raising me at all.”

“Shut up, now unlock the door, the key’s above the fridge and while you’re at it, get me some pain killers. When you get in, don’t overreact.”

Now he’s concerned… painkillers? Don’t overreact? What did Ritsu do......?

 

Turns out he’s going to regret ever asking that question.

**Author's Note:**

> no one was alive enough to proofread this. maybe in half a century.  
> (this was horrible. pls don't sue)


End file.
